Ah. I love the fall. I love the color change in the leaves.....I love the cool tempuratures....I just love it. And it's about damn time too, I feel like it's been summer for like four years now. I was starting to think it would never end. And now back to business- Wait. What? After everything I've done for you Arlo? I don't recall Mango being this ungrateful. Although, the twins seem to be taking the news rather well. "Whoa Buddy, you know you need to stay in the playroom. We'll go to the park later- okay?" "Kay." Eek- there's nothing that's not adorable here. "Okay. Now's the time Austin Viridi- you just have to have an air of confidance. Hey Snapple- you know you can trust this investment banker with all your sweet Snapple money." I like it. But try leaving out the phrase 'sweet snapple money'. Let's see where that get's you. Also- maybe save your poetic snapple lines for when you don't have toddlers running around naked. Miranda is unimpressed. Hey look! Arlo's back! And you both need a bath- like yesterday. "How is it fall in the desert and yet it's still like a million degrees?" "You're the one wearing a tailored suit in the desert." "Speaking of horrible life choices- I can't believe Mikey-" "Mckenzie." "Whatever. I can't believe she just like evaporated out of town and left you two kids. That's literally the most insane thing I've ever seen. And I've done peyote." "Yeah- it's crazy right? And I've looked for her everywhere. There's no record of the birth at the hospital and apparently what little information that Candice Mathers has is locked away by red tape." "So she can't tell you anything?" "Nope. Apparently when Mckenzie terminated her rights, she did so under the proviso that her information in be sealed- from everyone." "Dude. That is so fucking insane. If I ever saw her I'd kick her ass for you. I don't mind going back to jail- I don't care." "Wow. You've really been places haven't you." "Oh you don't even know. Welll- show me the kids, I hope they don't have your stupid egg head." "Very funny. Here you go- they're basically the most adorable things ever concieved." "Hahahaha- is the one on the right covered in glitter?" "Yeah. Matthias got into Madisons old studio- the results were not pretty." "I can't believe you are seriously considering not having a birthday party!?" "I don't know if you've noticed or not- but I've sort of been busy with my two toddlers to really think about it." "Bitch. That's what I'm here for. I'm throwing you a party." "One- watch your language at the toddler park, the other parents can be very strict. And two- hell no." "Ugh. Why not??" "Ummm- how about since the last party you dragged me to, I got two kids out of it." "Then don't screw anybody in a bush. Problem solved." She has a point. "Shut up." "Okay Buddy- blow out the candles! Hey Candice- can we go easy on the birthday horn?" "Whoops. Sorry Dear!" "And now your turn Baby Girl- blow out the candles! SAYA- the HORN?!" "Candice gave it to me. I'm incorporating it into my new protest." At last! Our two new Viridi's have become children! Matthias is now a 'goofball' and Miranda is a 'Genius' and also gained the 'happy toddler' trait. Matthias? You really shouldn't be playing in the rain- go play dolls with your sister. "No way! I LOVE the rain- it's amazing out here!" Awww. I can't be mad at such earnest love of precipitation. Yay! Halloween! I love holidays! "Ugh. Pulp. Pulp everywhere! I hate this pumpkin so much." It'a labor of love. Miranda wants a cat on a pumpkin and you promised her a cat on a pumpkin, so get back to it Austin! Those are some interesting costume choices kids. I know Matthias is....Yoda? And Miranda is......wearing a jumper? Huh. You're chosen costume was 'sausage', but if that's your interpretation then who am I to judge? "Nice costume Dork. Where's the rest of the Cantina Band?" "You're just jealous." "Hey! Mira, look- I have a video of Daddy swearing at a pumpkin!" "Hahaha, upload that immediatley." Speaking of parental holiday obligations- let's see what Austin is up to. "So THAT'S where I left those ornaments. Why are they in the halloween bin? Who organized these? Why is there easter grass in here? WHO DID THIS?" Music to my ears. But I must say- it looks pretty passable Austin- you done good. Ugh. This house is full of nerds. Ohhhhh- nothing says 'badass space bounty hunter' quite like a pumpkin spice latte. "Shut up." "Nice costume Dork." "You're just jealous." "Yeah, that's it. Anyway- don't forget about the birthday party- it's tomorrow night." "Damn. I was hoping you would have forgotten about that." "No such luck Boba. Oh by the way- nice pumpkin video." "What video?" "Are you excited for your birthday party Daddy?" "Ummmmm. Yeah I guess. You're Auntie Saya is planning it, so 'excited' might not be the best word." "Well I think it's gonna be AWESOME." "I hope so Baby Girl. I really hope so." "See? I told you this would be fun! You outta know to never doubt me by now." "Hahaha, I guess. Although- downtown dance club isn't what I had a mind by 'lowkey'" "It's okay- there are no bushes for like a mile- I checked." "Very funny. I'm gonna grab a drink- you want anything?" "Nah- you go, I'm challenge that weirdo with the pink eyebrows to a battle." I have to agree with Saya on this one. I think you deserve this. No joke- after everything that happened with the twins and Mckenzie- you should have a night out. Enjoy it Birthday Boy. "Thanks. Yeah- It's nice to just have one drama free week- you know." "Mckenzie?"
Whoops. Spoke too soon.
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About MeI am a elementary school teacher who loves bad puns and terrible movies. Archives
November 2019
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