Take a look at this family portrait. Those kids are bringing ALL the sass. Meanwhile, Kelly is still writing her many questionable books. In the 30+ books she's written, she's only had like three bestsellers- so why not go the Hollywood Route and just make sequels? Also. The maid is stuck on the porch. I can't get rid of her. She's definitley not cleaning my damn house.....but I'm still paying her. GO AWAY. "Baby- you're crazy is still my kind of crazy." Awwwww. If I didn't have to constanly play birth control for these two, I'd find this adorable. Wha? I said to 'be enticing' not......whatever this is. But hey! He finally has his aspiration! So- worth it? How should we celebrate? WHOA NO! Not like that! Cancel action! Cancel Action! I'm too young to be a parent again! Oh sweet watcher thank you. To celebrate- why don't we get Austin that new telescope he's been hankering for? Wow- toddler or teenager- this girl can't stand not being in the spotlight. What's got you so enraged Miss Maddie? "UGH. I don't know. I was just overcome with this immense feeling that the world and everyone in it is just THE WORST. I want everyone to just stop EXISTING." Hmmm....could be teen angst. Could be that you're actually evil. Only time will tell. In the meantime- why not take out your anger on the maid? Maybe if you insult her enough she'll finally leave. "Ugh. I guess." Well that didn't work. But you did make an enemy of whoever that is. "That didn't help at all." *scrubs furiously* There's always plan B. Feel better? "Yeah." ........... "What? I really like play doh." "Omigod. Moooom. Auuuuunt Summmerrrr. This is soooooo boooooring." Madi is really good at making her feelings known- apparently. "I don't get it Summer- didn't you have like two other roomates?" "Yeah! It's been a lot quieter since the explosion." "What Explosion?" "Oh." Oh. "Hey son- have you ever considered running the world? GET IT? Because you're on a TREADMILL." "Get out." Someone is hard at work on that 'Joke Star' aspiration. "And that's when she said- I asked for the weather, not your Tinder Profile." I can't tell if she's amused, or if she just feels sorry for you. Meh. Whatever get's results. Meanwhile, Scarlet is hard at work on latest entry of the 'Tune of Hot and Cold' fantasy series. Scarlet? You're a writer, not a handyman, are you sure you should be tinkering with advanced computer components? "Mooooooom, I don't feeeeeel good. Can I get a note for school?" "Nice try cupcake- I know about the concert." "Damn." "Heh. Nice try loser." "SHUT UP AUSTIN." Ahhhh. Familial love. And just like that you're old. How do you feel Miss Scarlet? "Old. That about sums it up." What a way with words. Our world renowned author everyone. Hmmmmm. What do you call this creature Maddie? "I think.....an Owl Jay. Like the cross between a blue jay and an owl. With a little fox thrown in for good measure." Okay. "It speaks to me." That's what I'm worried about. YOU'RE STILL HERE?! Oh look. Another vampire. I'm so surprised. I swear- is there like an exterminator for vampires on speed dial? Does Van Helsing have a direct line? Ugh. What happened to you? You know what- I don't want to know. And the tradition lives on- Powerhouse is alive and well! Now to slowly take over the club and usurp the leader! Some things never change- this is a weird ass group of people. Sometimes I wonder what's the point of the evil trait. Then I see options like this and I remember. The struggle is so real. This is what happens when you subside on cake and popcorn. *sigh* Why am I even surprised anymore? You know, maybe this is why I have so many f&%king ghosts in my town- Death is always lounging around. Slacker. And look at Summer- just chugging away at it. Madi- you've got quite a ways to go before you can compete with this level of chipperness. "So I ran into the Grim Reaper the other day...." "Wait....like the actual reaper? With the cape and everything?!" "Uh huh. He sort of hangs around a lot." "That's so damn cool." Wow. It's like stepping backwards in time. No time like the present to start that hostile club takeover. Oof. That's gotta hurt.
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About MeI am a elementary school teacher who loves bad puns and terrible movies. Archives
November 2019
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