Look at at that! It would appear that married life is suiting you well. It's certainly suiting my ambitions. Here's to hoping we don't need twelve kids to make this next generation happen. You know, It's funny- no matter what you're doing, you always manage to look pleased with yourself. Cue pregnancy confetti! "Hello?Heeeellllloooooooo?Anyonehome?I'vebeenouthereforeeeeevvvveer." Yeah, and every damned day since the day you moved out. Gotta cut those apron strings Summer. Taking after your parents huh? "Well, my therapist suggested it. Apparently he thinks I have anger issues." You? Whaaaat? No. "What with me bringing a new person into the world and all- it seemed like a good idea." You've been meeting a lot of goals lately. That first one is just a collection of your advice seeking customers. Is that legal? "Probably." And also- does it count as a 'best selling novel' if YOU gave it that label? "Probably." Okay then. Okay Kelly- it's just you and me. We are one grandkid away from meeting this thing- and Scarlet is about to pop any minute now. This has been a long time in the making, quite a journey indeed. In a strange way I've come to think of you as a friend, a confidant, a sister even. Yup- and now in the golden sunset of your life, you're about to meet your life aspiration. How does it feel Kels? Kelly? Kelly, what's that ominous musical sting? OH COME ON. YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. "Oh my god. I can't even right now. You have no way of knowing this, but I am fangirling so hard right now. I would love to like pick your brain for novel ideas. EEEK! This is the most exciting thing that's ever happened to me! I feel like I might burst!" OH FUCK YOU. a;suhvraurg937w4galihfa;ljsvueruieanvani848kblkjasnviun- Okay. I'm here. I'm cool. I am.....collected. *deeeeeep breath* No point on dwelling. What's done is done. Kelly is dead, and dick moves aside- we have a baby to deliver. That being said- Miss Scarlet? Ready for motherhood? Oh come on Scarlet- You don't get to pass out in an exhausted heep until AFTER you have at least three toddlers running around. DAMN IT KIEREN. Oh thank God- we have an actual doctor to deliver this child. You let Kieren in that room and it would not have ended well. I AM ON A THIN EDGE TODAY GAME. I think after everything that happened- both Scarlet and I need a nap. Here- you take him James. You know- Kelly may be dead. But the only person I really feel bad for is Squarechin. They had a great marriage. He was at work when she died, and he looks genuinely sad. "Who will help me pick out the right grapes now?" Alas, poor Squarechin- I do not know. Scarlet's weird fangirling forgotten for now- here's face we don't see in Newcrest too often. Small note- apparently children are assigned relationship tags depending on their relation score with their parents when they age up. Elliot is a 'Daddy's Boy'. This is hilarious to me. I though you were dead? WTF man? Stay away from the children! Here's baby Austin, though he's much less of a baby now! He's reached those toddler years and with them has gained the 'Charmer' trait. This kid makes THE BEST faces. "-and then it goes BOOOM!" "That's right penut! A seven car pileup goes BOOM!" I want to say I'm just walking into these conversations out of context- and that perhaps it's much more normal than that. But I sincerely doubt it. Seriously though- what is going on in this kids head? Should I be worried? Nah. I'm sure it's fine.
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About MeI am a elementary school teacher who loves bad puns and terrible movies. Archives
November 2019
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