Well you're in a good mood this morning. "Am I not allowed to be?" No- it's just I'm used to you being a lot more annoyed than this. "Very funny." D'awwwww. How sweet. At least I know you're too old to get knocked up again. "I'm retired- shoo." Oh Kelly. You'll never be rid of me. *cue maniacal laughter* It never fails to amaze me- you write violin concertos in your spare time, but you can barely bang out chopsticks on the piano. "At least I can play an instrument." Hey! I can play - "Smules 'Magic Piano' app doesn't count." Tell that to my star count. "Have you always been so annoying?" Nope! It's that's just an added bonus. I prefer to think of it as 'motherly goading'. "Whatever helps you sleep at night." *bing* Oh! What's that? I dare ask. 'Hey'- that's all you can muster? Come on Scarlet- you're an author! A weaver of dreams! A wordsmith of astounding proportions! Think of something clever! ACK! You're killing me Scarlet! He had fun! Say something cute! "Shut up! I'm thinking!" Just dig into that well of 'Scarlet brand DGAF' and ask him out! *sigh*- "If you'll recall- that 'Scarlet brand of DGAF' as you so lovingly put it- is what almost got me arrested." Yeah, okay, that's one side of the story. But there's also the side where Jaimie was a dick- sooooooo..... "You're a terrible influence." ASK HIM OUT. "This is a bad idea." Oooohhh- with a smiley face. Scarlet you minx. "Shut up." "Eureka!" Paola may be mini-Paolo, but Summer is all Kelly. Again- it's almost eirie. Damn- Elliot and Sofia really do waste no time. Talk about fertile. Hey Kels- how's about we pop over to Windenberg and meet your grandkids! UGH. THE CUTES. I love toddlers! But-I love them even more when they're someone else's problem. Meet the newest members of the Viridi Clan- Aubrie, Charles, and Colby. See Kelly? Isn't this so much more fun when you can spoil them and then GIVE THEM BACK. "Oh yeah- way better. Come along cutie- let's find out where your parents hide all the really sugary stuff! "Heh. Hi." Smooth. "Hey- do you wanna hit the Stargazer Lounge?" "Yeah, I mean yes- sure. Sounds great." Are you having a stroke? Oh wait- HA. You're nervous. That's adorable. "Shut up. I am not nervous. I don't get nervous." Okay then- must be a case of selective stuttering. That's totally a thing. "Heh." This is painful- I'd stick around, but I'm hate myself enough to sit through all of this. Okay- here we go- a few hours later- everyones a little more relaxed, and by relaxed I mean Scarlet's had a few and everyone's a little looser. "So that's when I was thinking the Megazord would be unleashed. I know there are some logistics to be worked out, but all in all I think Switzerland would pay top dollar for that kind of technology." "And all of this is the basis for your next book?" "Ummmm.....yeah. My next book. That's it." That's right- pay it for laughs. "You know, you really are the most unique woman I've ever met. It's intoxicating." My, my, my. Is that a come on? I belive it is! Woo! Get it Scarlet! "So wait- you're the composer from Starlight Struggle? I love that piece!" "Why thank you. I wrote that when I was fifteen." "Fifteen? You're genius." "I don't know if I'd go that far- you haven't heart me butcher chopsticks on the piano." Hey! Don't steal my material. "Do you wanna try something crazy?" "What did you have in mind? "DON'T YOU WANT ME BABY." "DON'T YOU WANT ME OOOOOHHHHHHH." Kareoke- aslo known as the official Viridi mating ritual. Who knew kareoke was such a turn on for some people? "Scarlet. This is going to sound absolutley insane. But- this feels like fate. There's something I never told you. The reason I left Sunset Valley, was because I had a girlfriend just like Jaime. She cheated on me too, and I- I don't know. I wasn't as brave as you, so I ran." Dude. She was arrested. I don't know if you want to be brave like Scarlet. "I know what you mean. Ever since I met you it's like my heart skips a beat. I've never met anyone who can actually leave me tounge tied. You know- most people just think I'm weird. Or Scary. Usually one of the two. I think deep down- that's why I let Jaime get away with sneaking around. Because....I didn't think I could find anyone who was willing to put up with my brand of insanity." "Believe me- You deserve better. And yeah- you're fucking insane- but your MY kind of insane. You're a badass and I love you for it. Scarlet Viridi- will you marry me?" *SQQQUUUUEEEEEEE* I'm a sucker for romance. "And THAT'S why I'll never eat convienience store cupcakes ever again." "I know what you mean man- the same thing happened to me but with cookies." The fact that he can say that with a straight face proves that he belongs in this family. Hey! Kelly look- you've finally mastered a marketable skill. How about making some money before you keel over? Still waiting on that last grandkid to finish that aspiration. Welp. The wedding is tomorrow, and speaking of big family changes- it would appear that someone is finally ready to step into young adulthood! And naturally she'll be taking Mango with her- I tried suggesting otherwise and just got real quiet and stared at me. When Summer Viridi get's quiet- that's when you have to be scared. Summer and Mango will be joining the Delgato Household in Bridleton Bay. She wanted to be closer to the fishermans warf, but unfortunatley there were no other households that she could mooch off of there. Behold our blushing bride- the first heiress to get married! This is quite an occasion! Which is why we booked the Chalet gardens instead of paying our bills. "You what?" Nothing. Look at the cake! And Paola? Seriously? who wears athletic wear to a wedding? At least she didn't wear her resting sad face- which is what Jaime was sporting on this lovely day. Yeah- that's the look of missed opportunity. Ah- the Chalet Gardens is my favorite wedding destination- so lovely. I can't wit to get my perfect shot! This is gonna be a keeper! And WAIT! Camera! Where are you going-the wedding is THAT WAY. Seriously? I had to miss the best part of the wedding to watch Roman Polanski's redheaded stepchild laugh himself to death? This is what I get for trying to be romantic.
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About MeI am a elementary school teacher who loves bad puns and terrible movies. Archives
November 2019
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